Out Of Grasp

I try hard
to overcome hurdles
fast approaching
Yet in every sense of the word 
I feel like a failure
Get closer to the prize
Before it slips away
Buy that lottery ticket
    full of hope    fingers crossed

Pinching pennies to pay the rent 
Swinging high     but not enough 
to release all my troubles 
Running to catch the bus 
watching it go by
the bus stop    a mere 500 feet away

Grasping a beautiful rose
pricking my fingers
Luscious plump berries
hiding behind a cave of thorns 
Extending my hand toward
ripe fruit on the tree
avocados, apricots, pomegranates

The car breaking down
before the next paycheck 
Speeding reading the library book 
finishing after due date
Are late fees a sin?

Needing more drugs
to stave off depression
I feel like I’m running
behind the pack
I wake up each day
to start anew
I put a smile on my face
to fake it

All my insecurities and woes
put into a bottomless pot
shoved high above on the shelf 
Yet    still within reach
Why can’t my uncertainties be out of grasp?

Does the imposter syndrome ever find a cure?